Cariel's Lullaby
by lululillie
Summary: Just a cute little oneshot for Warrior Of God. Cariel sings a Lullaby to Baby Harry
1. Chapter 1

His honorary guardian angel Cariel sang him softly to sleep as she had promised to do for Lily who was sick with the flu and with James passing it had been harder each day to do this on her own, but with Cariel beside her every step of the way it made things much easier.

There's a darkness that plays behind your wicked smile  
Aching sadness as you cradle me like I'm a child  
This is madness  
We're descending into madness

She hummed to him rocking him gently, as he cried. She was singing him a song she had heard on Lilys "Radio." Before.

And it chills me to the bone  
Even when you're gone I'm not alone  
I'm never alone

Her Gentle voice was slowly lulling Harry to sleep. She felt resolute with the situation upon her protecting Harry and Lily was now her full time job and with him in her arms all her thoughts of leaving her post drifted away.

I'm searching, desperate for a fracture in your shell  
With every passing day it gets harder to tell  
Where the demon stops and where you begin  
But I promise you this isn't how it ends

I am frightened as we tumble down the rabbit hole  
My grip tightens, I'm clinging to your missing soul  
You can fight them  
Together we can fight them

As she was bouncing along with cradling a now sleeping soundly Harry she was reminded of all the trials he was soon to face in his future and was stricken with sadness she kissed his forehead softly before putting him down for bed.

"I will always watch out for you Harry you can count on me to protect you that's a promise." She said softly as she put him down kissing his cheek one last time, she wrapped him up in his blanket and swiftly moved to leave the room glancing at him one more time before turning off the light and shutting the door.

 _Tell me you're not too far gone_  
 _That I'm not a fool for holding on_  
 _I have to hold on_

 _I'm searching, desperate for a fracture in your shell_  
 _With every passing day it gets harder to tell_  
 _Where the demon stops and where you begin_  
 _But I promise you this isn't how it ends_


	2. The angel on my shoulder

It was Harry's first day at kindergarten Lily wanted to take him but she was just starting a new job, and couldn't afford to miss the first day so she asked Cariel to take him who obliged.

Cariel made sure Harry had everything before dropping transporting them to the school grounds. When Harry learned that Cariel wasn't coming with her he threw his arms around her and begged her not to leave, Cariel touched gently rubbed his back and promised him that she would see him after school when his mother brought him home. This seemed to perk Harry up and he reluctantly let go and ran off to play with the other children.

* * *

Lily went to pick up her son at lunch little did she know things were about to get very interesting. The teacher had pulled her to the side telling her that her son may need to see a psychiatrist for the wild tales he had been telling them during show and tell. Harry had apparently made a picture of Cariel the odd thing was he drew her with wings. When the teachers gently asked why she had wings thinking maybe she was a relative that had passed on Harry had said she was his guardian angel and that she had protected him from an evil man who wanted to hurt him. The children had teased him about it which caused him to get upset and defend Cariel adamantly saying that angels were real. When one of the teachers wasn't looking she assumed he had thrown paint on her hair because it had turned a nasty sticky blue.

Safe to say in the following weeks Harry had not gone back to school and instead spent the days being watched diligently over by Cariel. Speaking of Cariel she had been perplexed at the picture Harry had drawn it was actually an accurate depiction of her wings down to the last detail but only special people could see an angels wings unless….. She looked at Harry playing in the living room She whispered mournfully. "Oh Harry what did that evil man do to you?"


	3. never grow up

**Inspired by Taylor swift never grow up I encourage you to listen while reading.**

"Harry come on time for lunch." Cariel called, while she put down the PB&J sandwich. Harry came running in from the open backdoor he had been outside playing. Covered in dirt and leaves he hastily whipped himself off before sitting down to eat his Lunch. Cariel laughed fondly at him silently. She had become Harry's caretaker when Lily was at her full time job as a healer.

* * *

Cariel was now putting a seven year old Harry to bed, he had, had a hard day at school with the kids picking on him today. She had wanted to go down there and have a talk with them herself but Lily had greatly advised her against it. Harry had tear tracks down his face having cried, hysterically after recalling the day's events to her. She ran her hands through his messy hair until he had stopped crying and was starting to dose off causing her to get up and turn his night light off she picked up his blanket and tucked him in, what happened next was something she would never forget. Harry snuggled into the blanket still very out of it mumbling. "Thanks mom." Before going into a deep sleep. Cariel stood frozen before silently moving out of the room. She knew if Lily ever heard of this she'd be devastated that she couldn't be there for her son so she kept this moment to herself.

* * *

Harry was now nine and itching to go to Hogwarts convinced he would finally be treated like an adult . Today his mother was dropping him off at school but Harry didn't want to be seen with her and teased so he threw a tantrum until she finally obliged and dropped him off around the corner. Lily leaned over to kiss him on the cheek and hug him goodbye but all she got was a door slammed in her face. Tears ran down her face as she watched Harry walk away. Lily had relayed the events to Cariel who promptly said she would talk to Harry about it. Harry had told Cariel many times that he didn't feel like his mother was there for him enough she knew it would be hard for Harry to understand his mother was just trying to keep a roof over his head wouldn't lessen the feeling of abandonment he felt at times, but he needed to understand Lily just wanted what was best for him. Cariel talked to Harry after school and that night Harry apologized to Lily and all was forgiven well almost.

* * *

Harry was now eleven and heading off to Hogwarts he couldn't wait to go! His mom had also promised she'd be there to see him off. Little did he know that there had been an emergency and Lily had to go. Cariel was the only one taking Harry to the train station that day. When Harry discovered this he was filled with disappointment and anger. How could his mother do this to him? She wasn't even going to say goodbye! Cariel hugged him before he went on the train giving him a letter from his mother.

When Harry had arrived at Hogwarts it was magnificent and magical exactly how he thought it would be. He had an amazing time until night that is when he found himself missing home. Missing his Mother kissing him good night though he would denie that feveretly should anyone ask him. He also Missed Cariel, who would look after him here he thought to himself? Cariel always made him feel safe and protected but here it felt like he was just unshelled from the world. Harry looked at the letter from his mother thinking about reading it but the anger with her from today still hadn't lessoned so he couldn't bring himself to read it and put it away in his suitcase.

* * *

Years later after the war Harry was moving into his first apartment as he was alone unboxing the feeling of emptiness overtook him. Harry moved to his old suitcase opening it there in a small compartment was the letter from his mother all those years ago when he had to go the train station all by himself. He opened it up the words filling him with warmth he had been a bit of a brat then hadn't he? He remembered all the times he just wanted to spend time with his mom while going over all his memory he couldn't help but feel like something very special, Very important was missing.


	4. Still an innocent

There Cariel stood silent as the marble statue she was made to be.

The funeral of Lily potter she had recently been to was now over and she stood to the side watching a now grown up Harry ushering his children away. She caught a glimpse of Albus and was amazed at how much he looked like Harry at that age.

she was leaving about to leave so she took another glance at Harry and what she saw made her heart break. Harry didn't look like he used to he looked like he had fought countless battles and lost tremendously because of them and now his mother was no longer with him the only person in his life he knew of that he could count on... Oh how she wished she could call out to him now but alas knew she couldn't and promptly disappeared from his life again.

* * *

Cariel stood in the nursery of Harry new baby Ginny had recently had her name was Lily and he couldn't be prouder however while the parents were out for the first time in months they left her unknowingly with a very incompetent babysitter who knew nothing of taking care of children causing Cariel to promptly knock her unconscious via two fingers to her forehead and take over herself. Currently she was rocking little Lily who had such innocent eyes so different from the Lily she knew eyes, so innocent and carefree. When Lily began to fuss Cariel began to sing the song coming to her after hearing it on a bus while she was acclimating to her new environment.

 _I guess you really did it this time_  
 _Left yourself in your warpath_  
 _Lost your balance on a tightrope_  
 _Lost your mind tryin' to get it back_

 _Wasn't it easier in your lunchbox days?_  
 _Always a bigger bed to crawl into_  
 _Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything?_  
 _And everybody believed in you?_

 _It's alright, just wait and see_  
 _Your string of lights is still bright to me_  
 _Oh, who you are is not where you've been_  
 _You're still an innocent_  
 _You're still an innocent_

 _Did some things you can't speak of_  
 _But at night you'll live it all again_  
 _You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now_  
 _If only you had seen what you know now then_

 _Wasn't it easier in your firefly-catchin' days?_  
 _And everything out of reach, someone bigger brought down to you_  
 _Wasn't it beautiful runnin' wild 'til you fell asleep?_  
 _Before the monsters caught up to you?_

 _It's alright, just wait and see_  
 _Your string of lights is still bright to me_  
 _Oh, who you are is not where you've been_  
 _You're still an innocent_

 _It's okay, life is a tough crowd_  
 _Thirty two is still growin' up now_  
 _Who you are is not what you did_  
 _You're still an innocent_

 _Time turns flames to embers_  
 _You'll have new Septembers_  
 _Every one of us has messed up too_

 _Lives change like the weather_  
 _I hope you remember_  
 _Today is never too late to_  
 _Be brand new_

 _It's all right, just wait and see_  
 _Your string of lights are still bright to me_  
 _Oh, who you are is not where you've been_  
 _You're still an innocent_

 _It's okay, life is a tough crowd_  
 _Thirty two, is still growin' up now_  
 _Who you are is not what you did_  
 _You're still an innocent_  
 _You're still an innocent_

 _Lost your balance on a tight rope, oh_  
 _It's never too late to get it back_

Cariel couldn't help the tears that spilled down her face as she sung softly to the young infant. She felt so responsible for not being able to protect Harry during certain moments in his life and she missed being able to hold him to hug him she missed her little innocent Harry and she admired and respected what he had become but no matter what to her he would always be still an innocent. Lily began to reach up and touch the tears on Cariels damp face. Cariel quickly whipped them away as she smiled down at an inquisitive Lily. Harry now had a good life and she couldn't be more happy for him couldn't be more proud.


	5. We all have to say goodbye at some point

**Don't read this chapter unless you listen to**

 **Never say Never by The Fray.**

Harry gazed at the woman who came to reap him as he fell away from the world in the literal dead of night. He couldn't place it but she looked familiar like a distant memory that just wouldn't surface.

"Oh Harry". She whispered such love and adoration in her eyes it made Harry Stumble back stunned. Did he know this woman?

"I'm sorry do I know you." He asked her politely. Yet desperately wanting answers to this unsolved puzzle.

"Yes." She whispered sadly her hand trailing down his cheek her eyes filling with great sadness. "Yes you do." "But it's to dangerous for you to remember even now. "I'm cashing in some huge favors just to be the one to reap you." She told him gazing at him solemnly.

So it was true?" Harry thought. He was dead. For some reason the thought didn't frighten him instead he was met with a sense of the purest form of peace any being could of imagined he was ready. He had lived a long life had three beautiful children he got to watch grow up and have children of their own. He was ready to move on from everything the world had to offer him and embrace the magnificent peace that death always so warmly offered he was wholly and truly ready.

"Where will I go." Harry asked her watching as she solemnly offered him her hand.

His statement held no fear only the childlike wonder and curiosity time and the world had slowly and often times painfully stolen away from him.

She gave him a bitter sweet smile and again offered her hand to him this time with emphasis. He took one last look at her for confirmation and placed his hand in hers welcoming the warm soft light that radiated through his entire being as his soul traveled to heaven where it would remain forever safe and forever loved. Cherished and at peace.


End file.
